We decided to go and peruse the shops in the newly opened mall, something we never really did. Looking at nursing wear and holding hands. As we ate gourmet burgers for dinner my wife said “this could be the last time we eat as a couple for a while”. I look back on these memories with a warm hazy filter and they always make me smile.
My memories also paint a picture of this day with heightened anticipation, some anxiety and excitement. That night we turned the lights off around 11pm. At 11:10 the lights went back on, her pupils dilated “I think it’s started” she said.
Fear of giving birth
My wife had always put off the idea of having children. She had had some awful experiences with Hospitals and had also heard all the horror stories about childbirth. These thoughts and experiences are powerful drivers for our behaviour. If you have some anxiety about a situation, ruminating with negative thoughts can create unhelpful behavourial templates in much the same way as going through these experiences could.
Birth as a positive experience
Luckily my wife had been introduced to Spritual Midwifery by Ina May Gaskin a wonderful book detailing beautiful positive birth stories. She was also told by enthusiastic friends, who were recently parents, about Hypnobirthing. We sent off for some different books and CDs on the subject.
My wife was a changed woman! She went from being terrified by the prospect of giving birth into a calm, confident and prepared pregnant lady. In fact she was so confident that we had decided that the birth would take place at home.
Our 1st born came into the world at home at 11am on January 25th, 12 hours after the surges (or contractions) started. I was so amazed by the transformation that my wife had gone through, so awestruck that she was able to change all the horror stories and her fear around into something wonderful. And that had all been down to her own will, her own determination and her own mind.
It was this life changing event that led me into becoming a Hypnotherapist. It gives me such satisfaction that I can help people change their lives for the better in so many different ways, but it’s especially rewarding when I get the opportunity to help people prepare for giving birth.
There are many positive stories available in the world to help you change the way you might think about child-birth (not least this one in the Mirror! http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/britains-luckiest-mum-enjoys-3-9178366)
Please get in touch if you’d like some help in preparing to create your own positive birth story.